Portugal Update: 3 Weeks In!
It Was Time for a Mindset Change
TL;DR: STILL no boxes and it started to get me down. Shane will be here next week! Laura will be here at the end of the month! Shane’s surgery is scheduled for January 8th. I made some friends!
Yesterday marked three weeks in Portugal! Since I last wrote I’ve got a few big updates:
Shane got his kidney cancer removal surgery scheduled for January 8th! We were hoping that meant he could come here ASAP, but he needs to get some additional tests done no more than 30 days before his surgery, so he’s also got those scheduled and now has a plane ticket to leave Chicago on December 10th, exactly 1 month after I left.
STILL no boxes. They’re being held and, apparently, combed through or waiting to be combed through by Portuguese customs. I have zero control over the situation so I’ve got to just control what I can control and try to let the rest go.
We got our AIMA appointment - our appointment to get our temporary visas turned into residency visas scheduled, but of course it is at the end of February when I’m planning on being in the US for a retreat. I don’t know what changing it looks like?! It’s a hurdle!
But I’m making progress! I spent Thanksgiving technically alone, but I zoomed with friends and family and had a really nice day for myself. I got invited to a party by Declan, the man who found our apartment for us, and I met some people there who I have been hanging out with! I took the above picture on a bike ride I went on with a new friend! I had a coffee date on Monday, and a lunch date yesterday! It’s really helping me learn about new neighborhoods and new places to go, and helping me build confidence to do more. I’m trying to be brave!
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Last week I did feel myself start to get anxious and down. I’ve been doing things, and buying small things for the apartment here and there, but most things I would think, “oh just wait until your boxes get here”, or I’d want to organize a bit but then stop myself and think, “oh just wait until your boxes get here”, or “wait until Shane gets here” - I started to build a little wall between me and DOING, waiting on these things to happen I had no control over.
And Friday, Black Friday, I had a little meltdown about it! I was trying to get a new phone line and it didn’t work so now technically my US phone number doesn’t work (of course), and since my mom was on my phone line now her phone also doesn’t work. Since I was already in a state of anxiety, this absolutely tipped me over the edge and I felt so isolated, frustrated, and hand-tied, unable to fix any of the problems I had.
Which is just a really unhelpful mindset to be in when you have NO CONTROL over any of the things you’re frustrated about. When I woke up Saturday I had to decide to let all of that go! It wasn’t serving me to stop myself from living waiting on my boxes, or stop myself from making small decisions or moving forward with anything because I’m unable to solve the problems I thought I’d have solved by now.
It was the perfect time to have a mind set shift because it helped me go out and make the most of the party I was invited to! My first outing in Porto! It was so nice to chat with people and see how happy so many other US immigrants are here. I’m hoping the connections I made will lead to meeting more and more people and feeling more and more comfortable in my new city.
And I am very excited for Shane to get here next week! I have so many things to show him, and a short list of things I’ve been waiting to do with him so we can experience things together. We’ll have three weeks together before he needs to fly back to the US for his surgery and I’m so excited for it.
Laura also narrowed down her travel plans and will be here at the end of the month! Our first guest! And I know she is going to love it, too.
So those are REAL things to look forward to, instead of wondering when the hell these boxes are going to show up.
As for our AIMA appointment? I’ve got an email into our immigration company to see what the best thing to do is. I’ll keep you posted! I would like to do my job! But I also really need this appointment. I’ll keep you posted!
I’ve also promised you numbers, but AGAIN I’m waiting on the final cost of the customs to add to the shipping cost. MINDSET CHANGE I should stop haha. More soon!
